2009 in review

I had big intentions for this holiday break. I planned to clean and organize around the house, write, and relax. But, as is often the case, life had other plans. 2009 went out with a storm to match the rest of the year. I can say that 2009 was one of the hardest years of my life, easily. Interestingly, A doesn’t feel the same way which intrigues me. People really can experience the same things and have very different feelings about it. Since we are starting a new year, new decade in fact, it is the time for reflection. I find it easier to to move forward after I have reflected on and processed the past. So what did 2009 hold for me? Even though it was a difficult year there were many blessings.

• January, February, and March were painful, literally. I was experiencing severe pain when I was supposed to have my cycles and was on various rounds of hormone treatments to try to get things fixed. The pain was awful and we were close to heading into surgery. But a blessing came in April in the form of a recommendation from a friend to go see a specialist. We went to the reproductive endocrinologist and felt relief finally after an in-office procedure.
  

  M Meeting Mickey and Minnie

• May was full of fun as we took our first family vacation to Disney.  It was an incredible week!  We had a long road trip, stays at various hotels, the Georgia Aquarium, Disney, MGM studios, and Ruby Falls.  It was wonderful to watch M experience all these new adventures and the awe on his face.  It couldn’t have been a more perfect way to celebrate M’s birthday or spend time together as a family.
• We also had some frustrations in May and June.  We have two rental homes and one of them had come open.  We had two different people back out on us after signing leases, one of which had already started painting!  It was so frustrating, especially when we work so hard to provide good homes.  I worked non-stop at the rental for two full weeks to have it ready and we did finally end up with wonderful tenants.
• In July we found out that we were expecting a baby, but then lost her that same week.  It was an incredibly difficult time.  I had a D&C that month and in August the pain from the start of the year was back again.  I had to have the same in-office procedure done again and begin to recover emotionally.
• We welcomed our new niece, L, in August.
  

  Holding my new niece, L

• In September I celebrated my 30th birthday, but not in any way that I had imagined I would.  I was still quite depressed about the miscarriage so I just didn’t feel up to partying it up.  It was a nice birthday spent with friends at dinner, very low key.
• October was a respite from chaos.  We enjoyed our Halloween and the fall season and M started his big boy school.
• November started the holiday season and brought mono back.  I never even knew I could get mono again after having it as a teenager.  It totally knocked me down.  I was very thankful to have a job with generous sick time because I had to use it as fast as I earned it.  This is also when I started this new blog.  Oh, and there was the whole ER trip for M when he decided to stop urinating!!
• December brought the usual family gatherings, M’s broken arm, illnesses for M and A, and some much needed time off work.
  

  In the ER with M

This was the first full year in our new home, a blessing I am so thankful for.  A and I weathered the rough financial storm the U.S. has been in pretty well.  We both retained our jobs, but are taking a pretty significant monthly loss on one of our rentals that can make some months tight.  This has been a VERY tough year for me professionally.  I have missed so much work and had a very difficult time focusing when I am there.  I have always prided myself on my work ethic and abilities, but for the past year I have been spending all my energy on only surviving (emotionally and physically).

I truly believe that life is about balance.  It is usually pretty easy for me to see the balance in things.  This year has been difficult to see the balance.  I try though, daily.  I remind myself that I am truly blessed and that pain and heartache is only temporary.  I am hopeful that 2010 will be an easier year, a year to progress and grow.